Sir Mix-A-Lot Thinks Your Blake Lively Oakland Booty Article Is Dumb



Blake Lively’s booty is no longer a safe space after she spit in the face of racial progress by quoting “Baby Got Back” even though she lives in Burbank. Tensions were high. Luckily, Sir Mix-A-Lot just freed your weekend up from that protest you had planned, because Pret-A-Reporter asked him why you were so mad and fuck if he knows. I’m putting this (more..) thing in here, because we’re gonna break this down all nice like.



Sir Mix-A-Lot wrote the first body positivity song you ever heard, and you bitches can’t even appreciate it. #honormycurves #celebratemysize

“So I wrote this song not as a battle between the races. I wrote the song because I wanted Cosmopolitan, I wanted all these big magazines to kind of open up a little bit and say, “Wait a minute, this may not be the only beautiful.” I mean, I don’t look at Serena Williams as fat. I don’t think she has an ounce of fat anywhere on her. I didn’t want there to be one voice. I wanted to say, “Hey, us over here! What we feel like is this.”

No, Los Angeles can’t  “be equated to elegance and/or beauty (read: whiteness)“. #kissthemirror 

What I meant by “L.A.” was Hollywood. In other words, makeup or whatever it took to make that face look good, they do it in L.A. But, as much as you can throw makeup on something, you can’t make up the butt. That’s what L.A. face and Oakland booty meant. You can put makeup on that face and make it look beautiful, but a butt is a butt, a body is a body. Fast-forward to Blake Lively. For her to look at her butt and that little waist and to say “L.A. face with an Oakland booty,” doesn’t that mean that the norm has changed, that the beautiful people have accepted our idea of beautiful? That’s the way I took it.

Blake Lively knows what the song means.

If what Blake Lively meant by that comment was, “Oh my goodness, I’ve gained weight, I look horrible,” if that’s what she meant — and I doubt that she did —  then I’m with the critics. But no one in the world is gonna tell me that a woman that wears that dress is thinking that she’s fat. No, I’m sorry, it just doesn’t happen. It sounds like to me like she was giving the line props. I think she’s saying, “I’ve got that Oakland booty,” or “I’m trying to get it.”

Sir Mix-A-Lot needs you to step the fuck back.

I think we have to be careful what we wish for as African-Americans, because if you say she doesn’t have the right to say that, then how do you expect her at the same time to embrace your beauty? I mean, I don’t get it. I think it’s almost a nod of approval, and that was what I wanted. I wanted our idea of beautiful to be accepted. I think now not only is it accepted, but it’s expected.

#YesAllWomen

That song was written with African-American women in mind, but trust me when I tell you that there are women out there with those curves everywhere, and they were once considered fat. And that’s what the song was about. It wasn’t about some race battle.

Now I know you guys mean well, but this is just another reason people hate Millennials. Sure 2036 will be great with the Amazon Prime weed delivery and free healthcare, but you might run into some problems with people catching felonies for thought crimes. But luckily, once you get out of the 18-34 demographic, nobody will take the time to read your Twitter anymore because they’re creating target ads for somebody else. Or they might be doing that now since most of you are broke. I guess you get a pass on that since your parents kinda fucked that up. Much like you’re fucking this up. See how that works? History is cool. But I’m sorry. I’m talking about something I really don’t know anything about really. I’ll leave that up to you. 



Feel free to quote Juvenile here if you’d rather take over with Cash Money Records in the 9-9 and the 2000.



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