Kim And Kanye Are Trying To Pretend That ‘North West’ Doesn’t Mean ‘North West’

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West Met Gala


As soon Kim Kardashian and Kanye West officially released the name of their child (during Game 7 of the NBA Finals, LOL), the Internet did their job by relentlessly tearing the obvious and novelty name to shreds. Because, well, "North West" is stupid. It's like Alicia Keys naming her child "The Black". And since Kris Jenner gets Google Alerts sent directly to the brain she keeps in her private vault at E!, "sources" are now attempting to backtrack and tell us that "North" is a deep metaphor meant to enscapsulate the love of a couple who never see each other. Ok.  TMZ reports:

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West were not inspired by a compass when they named their kid North … fact is, the name's more inspirational than directional. Sources close to K & K tell TMZ  … they chose the name North because they see it as a metaphor for "up", telling friends, "What's North of North? Nothing."  Translation … nothing better. We're told the duo believes baby North is their highest point together as a couple … the pinnacle of the relationship … and they consider her their "North Star." Kinda sweet. Almost makes ya feel bad for mocking it, right?

Bullshit. Can we all agree this is bullshit? Ok, good. Because this would be a sweet, believable story if the two parents involved could actually feel love for another human being besides themselves. A more believable reason is this one: Anna Wintour suggested the name and Kim agreed in the hopes she'll eventually land a Vogue cover that Wintour has stated she'll never get unless Wintour died. I'm really surprised at this point that Kim didn't let corporations bid for naming rights.