Fantasy Baseball: Helmuth’s Half Dozen – Week 1

Christmas morning, the first day of hunting season and Opening Day — ask my dad which of the three is his favorite holiday and it would be impossible for him to choose. Me, however, Opening Day is a near tie for first place…and not with hunting Bambi. 

To say I’m excited baseball is finally back is like saying a college Freshman is happy to be Spring Breaking in Panama City, Flor., only he’s seeing way more boobs. So good for you, you college Frosh, you. That’s okay, we fantasy nerds have way more fun…right? Right?

Anywho, on to the show, the first edition of Helmuth’s Half Dozen, where yours truly dishes out the six most important pieces of fantasy baseball advice each week in an attempt to improve — and hopefully not totally drive into oblivion — your fantasy team. But let’s be honest, if I have to choose between killing Bambi or your fantasy team I’m choosing your fantasy team every time. 

Pick-Up Of The Week!

Player that should be owned but could still be on the waiver wire in your league.

Charlie Blackmon OF – Colorado

Helmuth Hail Mary

It’s worth a long shot, but picking up this guy might be your lottery ticket for 2013.

Melky Cabrera OF – Toronto

Don’t look now — okay do — but the guy I drafted last year after a PED bust, meaning I cursed him for the year, evidently, has started off the season as hot as anyone and is available in nearly 70 percent of leagues. He has 3 home runs and is hitting .323. I would take a shot on him real fast. After all, maybe it was the pressure of a new contract with a new team in a new city that got to him last year. Or maybe it was just ‘roids and now he’s about to get busted yet again…What do you have to lose?!

Rookie Watch!

On the lookout for the next Mike Trout or Bryce Harper.

George Springer OF – Houston

Remember, Houston wants, er, excuse me, needs, a reason for people to be excited to come to the ballpark. The second-coming of Jeff Bagwell (with speed) is it. 

Pyrite Award

Who is fake gold.

Chris Colabello 1B/OF – Minnesota

Your AL Player of the Week ladies and gents! Colabello is batting near .400 with four doubles…Now we’ve seen 30-year-olds come out of nowhere and flourish before, ie, Ryan Ludwick. However, Colabello probably isn’t that. This is a 30-year-old with only 55 big-league games under his belt before this season and in that time only hit .194 while striking out 32 percent of the time. He has the power to hit 20 home runs but he’ll have a very low average and in a weak lineup also means few RBI opportunities. It is also extremely depressing that 30 is considered old in Major League Baseball and he who writes these words turns the big 3-0 later this year. 

Thank You Jesus!

Praise Jesus, God, Buddha, Allah, Muhammad, the Oak tree over there! My favorite player has been spared!

Josh Hamilton OF – Los Angeles Angels

Ripe Relievers!

Snatching up saves and holds however you can find them.

Jose Valverde RP – New York Mets

This is the ESPN Closer Chart. Bookmark it. Print it. Put a new one under your pillow each time it updates — whatever you need to do to follow it all season. You’ll need to stay on top of things if you want to earn saves and/or holds in your league throughout the summer. The Mets are already your No. 1 reason why.

Bobby Parnell, who was supposed to miss a few weeks — ya right — has now confirmed he’ll need Tommy John surgery. As of right now, if you want instant saves with incredible instability and chewed off finger nails, Valverde is your guy. However, Sandy Alderson, along with every other sane person, knows this is most likely a temporary solution, as he won’t completely verbally commit to Valverde being the team’s closer long term.

If you’re in a deep league, pick up — gross I know — Kyle Farnsworth, or — someone I find much more intriguing — Jeurys Familia. Even if they’re not closing they might get you some holds until they do. 

Jonathan Broxton RP – Cincinnati 

Also see if Brox-baby is available in your league. He’s coming off the DL and will most likely be the team’s closer until Aroldis Chapman returns. Because, ya know, that Hoover guy is awful. 

Hitter of the Week:

Mark Trumbo 1B/OF – Arizona: .314/5/13

Hurler of the Week:

Jose Fernandez SP – Miami: Can finally have a beer: 12.2 IP, 2 W, 17 K,  0.71 ERA, 0.79 WHIP

Josh Helmuth is the editor for CraveOnline Sports. You can follow him on Twitter @JHelmuth or subscribe at Facebook.com/CraveOnlineSports for the latest in sports on your newsfeed.

Photo Credit: Getty

 

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