Paris Hilton: Bride, no. Mother, maybe.

It looks like Paris Hilton won’t be needing this wedding dress any time soon. Page Six is reporting today that Paris’ boyfriend, Stavros Niarchos has finally left her. This may or may not be related to the fact that Stavros’ parents are disgusted with Paris and have refused to meet her. I, too, would like to pretend Paris doesn’t exist, but it’s not as easy for me. Her beak pecks away at the gossip columns every day, so she can’t be ignored. At this point, she’s pretty much “the most annoying sound in the world“.

She’s also being considered for the role of Mother Teresa in a movie biopic directed by Indian director T. Rajeevnath. And, no, this isn’t some This Is Spinal Tap, or Best in Show type of mockumentary about the famous humanitarian. This guy’s serious.

My agents in California have contacted Paris Hilton. Although there are several actresses willing to play the role of Mother Teresa, the most widely respected and loved person, the history of the actress who is finally chosen for the role would have to be analyzed thoroughly before she is chosen.”

I honestly cannot imagine what this guy from India has seen of this infamous American which would make him think she’s perfect for the role. His pictures of her must be limited to her posing with various members of her Animal of the Month Club. I hope he realizes that this (nsfw) is not a chihuahua in her lap.

Paris’ reps say the guy in red is who PETA protesters were really aiming for when they went flour tossing the other night. Right, Hilton. Clearly, they adore you.

Hi, I’m Paris Hilton’s ass and nipple. Have we met?


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