Lohan is Not Pregnant

Despite being seen carrying a pregnancy test into her hospital room, where she was being treated for “asthma”, Lohan’s publicist is denying any rumor that the teen actress is pregnant:

I’m happy to clear the air Lindsay is not pregnant. Lindsay is 100% not pregnant. She is much better. She is on her way home with her family. She is doing great.”

I’m just glad that Lohan decided to have the abortion in an actual hospital. I guess someone finally explained to her that there are other ways to put on weight other than having a baby and then selling it for drugs. This probably is the best thing for the baby though. Coming out looking like a pale cheetah would be bad enough. Having to listen to your mom’s crappy music while you try to sleep and finding the occassional bong water in your bottle would be less dignified.

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