According to these images, Elijah Wood is the center of our universe. We revolve around Elijah Wood once a year and he is our sole source of heat and energy. Elijah Wood is a ball of incandescent gas 109 times bigger than the earth. He emits life-giving rays that warm our children as they play in the fields. Elijah Wood’s ultraviolet rays are responsible for everything from the formation of fossil fuels to photosynthesis. We’d have no plants without Elijah Wood. We’d have no life on earth without Elijah Wood. The sad fact is, without Elijah Wood, none of us would be here.
If you stare too long at Elijah Wood, you will go blind. Think about that for a second.
