Patrick Schwarzenegger Probably Cheated On Miley Cyrus

Look, I’m slowly dying from food poisoning right now, so please understand that downloading and editing Miley Cyrus pics is a testament to my resolve and inner fortitude. The only question I have about this is why it hadn’t happened sooner.

Patrick Schwarzenegger might be taking a wrecking ball to his relationship with Miley Cyrus … as he got very close with some OTHER chick in Cabo this weekend. The timing of this is pretty odd … considering Patrick and Miley just went out to dinner last week with Patrick’s mother, Maria Shriver. It’s also possible this girl is just a friend … though “friends” don’t usually do body shots off one another. Then again, when Miley is your girlfriend, something like this is probably no big deal. Patrick seemed pretty chill about everything in this Instagram shot.

I don’t even have to look at this chick to know she’s hotter than Miley Cyrus, because if her ass weighs at least two pounds then Patrick has already upgraded and should be seeking this chick’s hand in marriage or for a handjob. To his credit, he’s trying to put out the fire on Twitter, but he’s dad had a secret Mexican kid with the maid, so you never know what the deal might be with these guys.