Emma Stone (1988-2012, 2012 – ?)

I just looked it up, and medical journals say its impossible to be as white as Emma Stone without your carotid artery being severed, so I have no idea how she’s walking around at the premiere of The Amazing Spider-Man. She looks like shit, so if the producers ever need me to be a technical adviser at the indian burial ground, just shoot me an email. I didn’t have any problems with my cat.