The actual heroes CNN saluted were all pretty unattractive, but the guests were decent.
In Jessica Alba‘s case, extremely bangin’. I hear she’s a hero to screenwriters everywhere.
Annalynne McCord looks like the Crypt Keeper, but she’s a PR hero for convincing the brass on 90210 that she’s the hot breakout star.
Demi Moore is a hero for cougars and plastic surgeons:
Emmy Rossum is a hero for girls who want to stay relevant by dating and dumping trolls.
John Legend and his lady, Christy Teigen, are heroes because she tweets us and he reads us.
I don’t know who Shay Mitchell is, so I’ll say she’s a hero because she’s Mulan:
And as for the banner picture, Gerard Butler is a hero for Sparta. And for my vagina.
