The FBI Cleared Brad Pitt

After being cleared by the Los Angeles County Department of Children and Family Services on November 9,  Brad Pitt has also just been  cleared of child abuse by the FBI after he allegedly had some type of altercation with his 15-year old son, Maddox, during an international flight last month. The incident, which also lead to the Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt divorce, led FBI investigators to interview Jolie and the kids for almost 3 hours.  Anyway, long story short, the whole case has been dropped.

“The FBI has conducted a review of the circumstances and will not pursue further investigation,” said a statement sent to USA TODAY by FBI spokeswoman Laura Eimiller. “No charges have been filed.

You know what else is about to get dropped? A shit load of money on Christmas presents out of Brad Pitt’s wallet. Sorry about what I did on the plane, Maddox. Here, I bought you Cambodia. Go wild. Merry Christmas.