Not only does Heidi Montag suffer from body dysmorphia, she also appears to have been dropped on her head as a kid. Monsters and Critics reports:
The Hills star posted a 30-second video clip of herself shooting targets at a gun range, with the help of an American Defence Enterprises instructor, on what she believes was director Michael Bay’s Twitter page. Before launching into action-hero mode, Montag turns to the camera and says, “This is for you, Michael Bay”, before moving around the target range and firing at will. But it is not known whether the reality star sent her audition to the real Michael Bay or someone else with the same name. The person who received Montag’s message – known as “the fake Michael Bay” – posted a bizarre reply: “Thanks sweetheart, but how are you with Turtle wax on Ferrari paint?”
I have no idea what being at a shooting range has to do with her tits, but maybe she should take a walk on the beach or skip rocks across a lake and think about it. The only way she could make a good audition tape is if she was on a tarp and Guy #12 was jacking off because Guy #11 was taking too long.
Note: Not gonna lie, this pic kinda turns me on. I live in the South. What do you want from me?
