That’s America’s Dick: Chris Evans’ NSFW Nude Photo Proves He’ll Do Anything to Get Your Attention About the Importance of Voting
We’ve got good news and we’ve got bad news. The bad news is, the entire world was the recipient of an unsolicited dick pic. The good news is, it was the dick of Chris Evans.
Yes, Captain America recently found himself in a bit of scandal after he accidentally leaked some photos that showed off his, well, privates. It was a completely unintentional move that came about with the purest of intentions. In a now-deleted Instagram story, Evans shared a screen recording of a game he was playing with his family. The video ended and cut to a shot of his phone’s camera roll which, unfortunately (or quite fortunately, depending on whom you ask), featured a meme of Evans’ face with a caption that read “Guard that pussy,” as well as a photo of what was, presumably, Cap’s penis.
As you would expect, the internet went crazy. Screenshots were taken, articles were written, jokes were made and many a housewife probably fainted. This wasn’t just a regular explicit photograph. This was Captain America’s Dick! It had been sought after for decades and probably has more power than Thor’s hammer. Twitter lost its mind and a number of Evans’ friends and colleagues came to his defense…while also poking fun.
Me: I’m so incredibly anxious about logging on to work the weekend shift tomorrow after five days of being offline
Chris Evans: I will leak my nudes
— Nicole Gallucci (@nicolemichele5) September 12, 2020
chris evans did nothing wrong he just saw marvel stans asking for content it’s our fault for not being more specific pic.twitter.com/LQfnMJVadF
— (@itsjustanx) September 12, 2020
.@ChrisEvans Bro, while Trump is in office there is NOTHING you could possibly do to embarrass yourself. See… silver lining.
— Mark Ruffalo (@MarkRuffalo) September 13, 2020
Was off social media for the day yesterday.
So.
What’d I miss?
— Scott Evans (@thescottevans) September 13, 2020
To his credit, Evans himself used the publicity to do some good, which is exactly what Captain America would have done.
Now that I have your attention
….VOTE Nov 3rd!!!
— Chris Evans (@ChrisEvans) September 15, 2020
We knew Evans was patriotic; ‘America’ is literally in the name of his most well-known movie role. But he really took this whole voting thing to a whole ‘nother level. So in November, when the world finally ousts Trump, we’ll have Chris Evans and his ‘lil Avenger to at least partially thank. And it makes sense that his penis would be a major contributing factor to the upcoming election. Because it’s not just Chris Evans’ dick — that’s America’s dick.
Cover Photo: Frazer Harrison
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