Something has been happening to Christmas over the last decade or so, and itās happening on the nationās preferred delivery system of wholesome schmaltz, The Hallmark Channel. Specifically,Ā Hallmark Christmas movies.
Every year, throughout the months of November and December, the network plays wall-to-wall Christmas movies, many of them original productions, that blithely espouse wholesome family values. Small towns are always better than big cities. Spending time with the family is always better than going to work. And people who hate Christmas are always just a few shenanigans away from learning a valuable lesson about why Christmas is totally freakinā awesome.
Hallmark Christmas Movies
Whether you believe in these ideals, find them hypnotically naive, or even if you just get an ironic kick out of all this silly sincerity, thereās a lot of entertainment to be found in all these Hallmark Christmas movies. And as it turns out, a LOT of people are watching them. Theyāre one of the top-rated networks on television every holiday season.
Of course, not all Hallmark Christmas movies are equal. Some are bad by any estimation, many are simply forgettable. But if youāve watched as many as I have (and Iāve watched a LOT, donāt judge me) youāll find that some films clearly stand out. There are a handful legitimately well-written, acted and produced Christmas movies that have come out of Hallmark over the last decade or so, and a lot of other movies that entertain despite themselves, or because they commit to being unapologetically cheesy.
So set your DVRs, folks: these are the Hallmark Christmas movies that are actually worth calling hallmarks!
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25. The Nine Lives of Christmas
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
Brandon Routh (Legends of Tomorrow) plays a bachelor firefighter who accidentally adopts a cat and learns how to take care of the critter with the help of a veterinary student played by Kimberly Sustad (A Bride for Christmas). It doesnāt get much cuter, or simpler, than that. But althoughĀ Nine Lives of ChristmasĀ is a shabby tabby of a movie, and feels like a lot of the production was basically thrown together at the last minute, Routh and Sustad have fantastic chemistry together and make the whole film airy and cheerful.
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24. Let It Snow
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
Candace Cameron Bure from Full House,Ā who is in a LOT of these movies, stars as a busy business executive who doesnāt much care for snow or Christmas. But when her company acquires a family-owned ski lodge, she has to spend the holidays at their small town getaway, learning that love is more important than money, and (of course) falling in love with the rugged hunky guy, played by Jesse Hutch (Arrow). Itās even more cookie cutter thanĀ A Cookie Cutter ChristmasĀ (which didnāt make the list), but thatās what we want from a Hallmark Christmas movie.Ā Let It Snow hits all the right beats. With a snowball.
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23. 12 Gifts of Christmas
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
A busy businessman (Aaron OāConnell,Ā The Haves and Have Nots) is so busy with business that he canāt make the time to buy Christmas presents. So he hires a down-on-her-luck painter, played by Katrina Law (Arrow) to buy gifts for all his friends. Along the way she teaches him the importance of giving with your heart instead of your wallet. Itās a relatively novel premise for a Hallmark Movie, with a positive message that goes a little bit beyond āChristmas is goodā and ābusiness is badā.
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22. Christmas Song
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
It took a surprisingly long time for Hallmark to make their own Christmas version ofĀ Glee, but it was worth the wait. Natasha Henstridge (Species) and Gabriel Hogan (Heartland) play mismatched high school music teachers ā sheās a little bit classical, heās a little bit rock ānā roll ā who hate each other because reasons, and also because at the end of the season, only one of them will get to keep their job. Naturally it all culminates in a singing competition, but there are amusing stops along the way. Henstridge and Hogan seem to be having a lot of fun as they accidentally wind up on a blind date through an online service, and then they end up on a blind date AGAIN after they both change their profiles to make sure they donāt end up on a blind date again.
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21. A Christmas Detour
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
A blizzard strikes the eastern seaboard and a bunch of Hallmark characters are trapped at the airport together. Candace Cameron Bure (again) is en route to see her suspiciously perfect husband, Paul Greene is the guy who didnāt want to go home for Christmas anyway (bah humbug), and Sarah Strange and David Lewis are an estranged married couple, in a rare Hallmark portrayal of married life as something other than total bliss. The protagonists are boiler plate, and sometimes even a little annoying, but Sarah Strange and Paul Greene are incredibly genuine and heart-warming, and they steal the whole movie.
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20. Once Upon a Holiday
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
The princess of the fictional European country of Montsauri has gone AWOL in New York City! (There are a lot of fictional European countries in Hallmark movies. Weāre going to run into more of them.) Briana Evigan fromĀ Step Up 2 The StreetsĀ plays the princess, Paul Campbell fromĀ Battlestar Galactica plays the hunky guy who thinks sheās a delusional vagrant, and somehow this obvious riff onĀ Roman HolidayĀ finds its own romantic groove.
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19. Farewell Mr. Kringle
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
Busy reporter Christine Taylor (Zoolander) thinks that her latest assignment will be all business, but when she reports on the retirement of a small town Santa Claus, whoās been doing this for 50 years, she learns about the true meaning of small towns and Christmas and falling in love with bed-and-breakfast owners. Meanwhile, Vivica A. Fox literally phones in her whole performance as the heroineās boss, who keeps calling from the big city. Taylor is very convincing and the filmās heart is definitely in the right place.
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18. A Royal Christmas
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
Lacey Chabert (who, like Candace Cameron Bure, is in a lot of these things) finds out her hunky boyfriend is the crown prince of the fictional European country of Cordinia, so she spends Christmas marveling at his opulent castle and running afoul of his disapproving mother, played with despicable relish by Jane Seymour (Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman). Oh, and Chabert is a struggling dress designer. That might be important later.Ā A Royal ChristmasĀ is wish-fulfillment claptrap, but itās SINCERE wish fulfillment claptrap, and Seymour is so danged good that you wonāt care that youāve seen it all before.
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17.Ā Northpole
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
Christmas is in danger! People arenāt being festive enough! And the only way to stop it is to send a magical elf (Bailee Madison,Ā Donāt Be Afraid of the Dark) to help a single mother and her young son find the yuletide spirit. Thereās something infectiously ludicrous about how, with all the horror and despair going on in the world, a single mom reporter having generalized trouble connecting to her son in a small town is the cultural tipping point. Tiffani Thiessen (Beverly Hills 90201) co-stars, and for once Hallmark spent some serious money on visual effects. The city ofĀ āNorthpoleā is enchantingly Christmasy.
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16. Just in Time for Christmas
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
The best of the (many) Hallmark Christmas riffs onĀ Family Man stars Eloise Mumford (Fifty Shades of Grey) as a psychology teacher who gets the business opportunity of a lifetime, on the same night that her small town boyfriend Michael Stahl-David (The Light of the Moon) proposes to her. She canāt choose both, so a magical William Shatner shows up and rockets her into a future where she picked business over love, and reconnects with her boyfriend, who has since moved on. Also, Christopher Lloyd shows up as her grandfather, who poo-poos the whole idea of time travel. Ha ha ha. Anyway, the premise works, and the cast is uniformly great.
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15. One Starry Christmas
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
One of the most common jokes (heck, Iāve made it several times already) is that Hallmark Christmas movies arenāt very original. But Iāll say this aboutĀ One Starry Christmas: Iād never seen a romantic comedy about a Christmasy astronomer falling in love with a cowboy before. Sarah Carter (Falling Skies) plays the scientist, en route to meet her boyfriend for the holidays, who gets sidetracked with a hunky hunk. Itās amazing how just giving these stock characters unusual occupations can liven up a Hallmark movie. Itās the little things that make them magical.
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14. Ice Sculpture Christmas
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
Ice Sculpture ChristmasĀ is a movie about ice sculptures and Christmas. But itās an unusually good one. Rachel Boston (Witches of East End) stars as a chef who reconnects with her childhood best friend, played by David Alpay (The Mistletoe Inn), after he signs them up for an ice-sculpting contest. The only problem isā¦ sheās competing against her new boss! Boston and Alpay are fantastic together, and the backdrop of a yuletide competition makes the film more engaging and suspenseful than most of the rest of its Hallmark ilk.
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13. Marry Me at Christmas
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
Rachel Skarsten (Birds of Prey) owns a small town wedding dress shop, but when two young lovers want to get hitched quick, she also signs up to be their last-minute wedding planner! Oh yeah, and the brideās brother is a famous movie star! Thatās a whole lot of contrivance for just one movie, butĀ Marry Me at ChristmasĀ makes it work. Skarsten and her co-star Trevor Donovan (90210) are exceptionally likable together, and heās an unusually distinctive character, repeatedly trying to make his sisterās wedding more creative and elaborate than anybody else does.
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12. Iām Not Ready for Christmas
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
ItāsĀ Liar LiarĀ but at Christmastime. Thatās it, thatās the whole premise. But itās a good premise, and it works becauseĀ Iām Not Ready for ChristmasĀ stars Alicia Witt (Twin Peaks: The Return), who may be the most charismatic star in Hallmarkās staple. She plays a busy businesswoman who lies to her family because business, and she really seems to struggle with the unexpected revelations ā to her friends, family and herself ā when she starts being 100% honest all the time. Also, she sings the filmās theme song, which is pretty darned catchy.
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11. Crown for Christmas
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
ItāsĀ Maid in ManhattanĀ but at Christmastime. Mostly. Danica McKellar (The Wonder Years) plays a lovable hotel maid who accidentally winds up impressing the crown prince of the fictional country of Winshire, and gets herself hired as the governess of his ill-behaved young daughter. Good people fall in love, stuffy people get stuffed, and everyoneās just so danged pleasant that you donāt really mind how formulaic it all is. Most of the Hallmark Christmas princess films are pretty interchangeable, and Crown for ChristmasĀ is no exception, but itās hard to deny that it gets the formula right.
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10. Christmas at Cartwrightās
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
Alicia Witt (again) stars as a down-on-her-luck single mom who gets a little extra help for the holidays, in the form of an angel played by the great Wallace Shawn (The Princess Bride). Now sheās playing a department store Santa Claus and romancing the handsome owner of the store, who has no idea that sheās also the old Kris Kringle who he confides in over lunch. Itās actually a pretty cute premise, and ā SPOILER ALERT ā when the lies are ultimately revealed, itās extremely heartwarming that the town fully embraces a woman playing Santa Claus.
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9. Fir Crazy
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
Sarah Lancaster stars as a busy businesswoman who loses her job and is forced to take over her familyās Christmas tree lot during the busy holiday season. Along the way she runs afoul of a Grinchy department store mogul (Colin Mochrie,Ā Whose Line Is It Anyway?) and romances a studly guy (Eric Johnson,Ā The Knick). The change in scenery makes a lot of the familiar Hallmark Christmas clichĆ©s feel fresh, or at least freshly pine-scented, and Mochrie brings a lot more to his villain role than you might expect.Ā Fir CrazyĀ is fir real.
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8. Hitched for the HolidaysĀ
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
Hitched for the HolidaysĀ would probably earn a spot on this list just for being one of the rare Hallmark Christmas movies that acknowledges the existence of Hanukkah. But on top of that, itās probably the second best of the (many, many, MANY) āfake engagementā movies that populate this genre. Joey Lawrence (Blossom) plays a bachelor whose dying grandmother wants to see him married before she goes, so he enlists Emily Hampshire (12 Monkeys), who has a meddling mother of her own, to pretend to be his fiancĆ©e. Lawrence and Hampshire are great together and their families are brimming with humor and personality as well.
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7. Charming Christmas
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
Busy businesswoman Julie Benz (Dexter) is the manager and soon-to-be owner of a small town department story, but sheās just to busy with business to get into the holiday spirit. All that changes when she gets roped into playing Mrs. Claus with the storeās new Santa, David Sutcliffe (Gilmore Girls), whose real name is Nick and who may turn out to be the real deal. Or maybe not. Julie Benz is particularly good here, David Sutcliffe matches her at every turn, and the strong supporting cast reminds us that thereās more going on than just the protagonistās (rather predictable) problems.
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6. Help for the Holidays
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
Hallmark Christmas movies donāt get sugarier thanĀ Help for the Holidays, a schmaltzy story about an elf played by Summer Glau (Firefly) who disguises herself as a nanny to bring Christmas cheer to a family torn apart by, you guessed it, business. You see, Mom and Dad are busy business people making money off the Christmas season, and their kids arenāt having any fun, and apparently thatās the worst thing happening in the world this year so they get a lot of magical assistance. Thank goodness Summer Glau is such a genuinely cheerful performer that the film overcomes its obvious flaws, and becomes a delightful (albeit somewhat guilty) pleasure.
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5. A Very Merry Mix-Up
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
A VeryĀ Merry Mix-Up, and all the other films in our top five, are legitimately rather good movies, not just in the context of the Hallmark Christmas genre. Alicia Witt (again) is traveling to meet her fiancĆ©ās family for the holidays, but heās a busy businessman who gets called away on business, so she ends up traveling all by herself and accidentally spends Christmas with the wrong family. Thatās actually a pretty good set-up, and the cast playfully dances around the obvious reveal as long as possible before dealing, kindly, with the emotional fallout after the big reveal. Mark Wiebe plays the hunky hunk who loves Christmas, who has to stay up all night making cookies with Alicia Witt because they both get concussions (itās a long story), and he compliments her charismatic lead performance nicely.
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4. The Mistletoe Promise
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
The best Hallmark Christmas fake engagement movie doesnāt reinvent the wheel, it just makes a really good wheel. Jamie King (Sin City) and Luke Macfarlane (Killjoys) star as busy business people who have pretty good reasons for souring on the Christmas season, and who decide to pretend theyāre in a romantic relationship to make it easier to navigate their many social responsibilities. Smart writing, clever dialogue and two splendid lead performances elevate a very simple premise into a movie that easily stands out from its fake engagement ilk.
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3.Ā The Mistletoe Inn
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
Alicia Witt (yes, again) stars as a Christmas romance novel writer ā itās a real thing ā who decides to come out of her shell and finally show the world her work. So she goes to a writerās conference and meets, bonds and explores her creativity with a fellow struggling writer, played by David Alpay (Ice Sculpture Christmas). The two leads are genuinely great together, and the filmās affection for its own genre and metatextual references to other Hallmark Christmas stories make it a real treat for anyone who genuinely loves these movies. And if youāre a writer, or any sort of artist,Ā The Mistletoe Innās themes and suggestions are truly sensitive and helpful about the process.
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2. Naughty or Nice
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
The snarliest Hallmark Christmas movie is also one of the best.Ā Naughty or NiceĀ stars Hilarie Burton (One Tree Hill) as a yuletide Grinch who stumbles across Santaās fabled list, and uses the information she gathers for her own personal gain, and to expose the misdeeds of everyone she knows. Of course, her shenanigans get out of hand, and she has a valuable lesson to learn. Another solid premise, andĀ Naughty or NiceĀ plays with the possibilities well, building likable relationships and telling jokes that are ā unlike many Hallmark comedies (which often coast on amiability) ā legitimately pretty funny. And because itās a little more cynical than most Hallmark movies, the happy ending doesnāt feel like foregone conclusion, making the whole film very satisfying.
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1. Christmas Under Wraps
Hallmark / Crown Media Holdings
Candace Cameron Bure (again) stars as a doctor fresh out of college who accidentally finds herself with only one job prospectā¦ in a small townā¦ in Alaska. She thinks itās only temporary, but she finds herself increasingly charmed by this small town with weird traditions, and that would have been enough this time. Smartly written, cheerfully acted,Ā ChristmasĀ Under WrapsĀ is perfectly charming on the surface. The filmmakers donāt even overplay the many, many clues that something else is going on in the background, and that there may be a reason why Garland, Alaska feels so magical.
There are cleverer Hallmark Christmas movies, there are weirder Hallmark Christmas movies, butĀ Christmas Under WrapsĀ is the quintessential Hallmark Christmas movie. Itās everything you think of when you think about this genre, done right.
Top Photos: Hallmark /Ā Crown Media Holdings
William Bibbiani (everyone calls him āBibbsā) is Craveās film content editor and critic. You can hear him every week onĀ Canceled Too SoonĀ and watch him on theĀ weekly YouTubeĀ seriesĀ What the Flick. Follow his rantings on Twitter atĀ @WilliamBibbiani.