The Cashbox: Sick, Sick, Sick Of All The Hogan Drama

Chris Cash

I am sick, sick, sick of all of those that state they are “sick, sick, sick of all the Hogan drama”.

I was meaning to try and touch on this subject during the recorded version of the Voice of Wrestling Nick and I just put up this morning. However, there was so much to talk about, we didn’t get around to addressing this issue.

With that said, I figured I would open myself up to plenty of criticism by somewhat defending the cultural icon-turned-media’s recent biggest heel via this editorial. Let the floodgates of hell-mail open at once you try and make it through this article.

Imagine if you were in Hulk Hogan’s shoes.

I’m assuming that on the surface, everyone of you feel like you can do that. Deep down though, it’s impossible. That is true, of course, unless you are another extremely famous celebrity reading this site. In which case, call me!

However, if you are not a similar celebrity and never have been, you are what I classify as an “average” person. Average meaning not making millions solely because of your name. Average meaning people outside of family and friends have no clue who you are and never will.

Until you become one of these people, to honestly try and understand what another “human being” that is in that spotlight is going through is in complete poor taste and judgment.

Let me clarify quickly by saying that I am tired of hearing about the Hogan’s melodrama as much as the next guy, but there is a difference in simply being tired of them and taking it as far as a few select reporters have done as of late.

You can disagree with how Hulk, Nick, and Linda (most people excuse Brooke as being the most “sane” in the group, so I will too) have handled themselves publicly in recent months; you absolutely have a right too. Additionally, you can speak out through whatever public forum you can find and I’m not criticizing you for that.

The part that I have a problem with is aside from one person’s disapproval of another’s actions, to try and put it off like you can fathom the situation they are in and going through is as asinine as Glenn Gilbertti thinking TNA is the best thing out on television today.

Let’s “try” to imagine though what it’s like:

We’re Hulk Hogan. We’re extremely famous. We just bought alcohol for our son which has been all but completely proven. Soon thereafter, our son crashes his car with alcohol in his system, eyewitnesses say they saw him speeding, and a passenger friend of our son is left paralyzed.

Fast forward.

We are a famous, famous celebrity and media is all over this horrific event. We have a ton of money. Subconsciously, we know we have to do the right thing for the victim while at the same time, looking good in front of the cameras.

We know investigation is going to reveal some ugly facts about the events leading up to the accident. Therefore, in order to keep our public image as positive as we can, we do things to spin it. Whether those things are the right thing to do or not, it’s still business as well.

We financially support the mother of Nick Graziano. We start a charity for Nick. We do media to announce our sorrow and grief for the victim and his family. Again, the “average” people do this and it’s simply looked at as the right thing to do. We’re Hulk Hogan though and the media is going to dig and dig until they find something to use against us.

Fast forward.

We are having problems with Linda. Who knows, “in reality”, how she really acts. I put “in reality” in quotations because honestly, there is no “real life” with us (as Hulk Hogan) as it relates to the “average” people.

A divorce is inevitable and yet, this is another piece to the horrific puzzle that is quickly becoming our life. Media spin again. Whatever it takes – we are famous.


Bam! Lawsuit by the family of Nick Graziano? Why are they turning on us all of a sudden? Are they honestly going to blame us for their son’s extremely unfortunate state? Did he not have a choice of whether he wanted to get into the car with Nick or not? Did he not have a choice to wear a seatbelt? Are they simply taking advantage of the fact that we have money? I know this is horrible. It is for us too, but come on, you can’t blame us for this entire thing, can you?

Media spin!

Our son Nick has been tried and proven guilty. 8 months in jail. He’s a spoiled kid and the celebrity has definitely gone to his head, but hell, it has gone to our head as well. Not to mention, regardless of his transgressions, he is still our son! The “average” people love their kids endlessly, we should be able to as well, right?

Fast forward.

What we thought were private conversations with our son have now been released to the public! Sure, there are selfish things said about tv deals and reality shows once Nick gets out of jail. That is “one” of the thousand things we discussed during these conversations. Why didn’t they release all of the conversations?

Media spin.

Larry King wants us on his show. Here’s a good opportunity to put ourself over as a sympathetic father. That’s what we are. We have been through hell lately from a personal and public standpoint. We are going to try and set the record straight for the world – the “average” people – to see.

Fast forward and back to “not” being Hulk Hogan.

Does that help in any way? Or do you still feel the same disgust for Hogan as you did before?

Regardless, I somewhat feel for Hulk Hogan.

Maybe I’m simply one of the many people that have been left victim to his man*pulation and deception that so many wrestlers speak of – or maybe, deep down and especially now during this trying time, Hulk Hogan is not really that bad of a guy.

He’s simply doing what every one of us would do if we were in the same position. We, “the average people” simply do not understand what he’s going through. And never will.

Unless we ever become more than “average”.

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