Dean Martin

Chances are, you have been drunk before. You might even have a few entertaining stories about the time you got wasted and did something crazy, like rode a bicycle through a bar or danced with a dog or ate a policeman, and that earned you some small measure of notoriety. And so you feel mildly famous for your drunken dog-bicycle-cannibal antics. But what if you got blackout smashed and in the morning it turned out you had redefined American literature forever, or conquered the Mediterranean? In that case, you might find yourself on this list of famous drinkers, and you also should probably call in sick because you are ...