Meet The Fine Folks Who Dress (And Compete) As Ponies For Sexual Gratification

Bdsm toys for pain and pleasure. Photo: IgorIgorevich (Getty)

They claim they’re just “normal taxpaying citizens,” but frankly, we’re having a hard time classifying anybody who says, “I can feel through the bit when he actually changes from a human headspace to a horse’s,” as normal.

According to Mirror, there is a group of people who meet in New Orleans twice a year to get their rocks off by dressing up as ponies. Except, this isn’t a “Hey, let’s take a couple of pictures and then go watch horse races” type of group.

No, siree. (Or should we say “nay?”)

The “Ponies on the Delta” club is made up of people sporting mouth gags, face masks, latex, leather, fishnets, whips and chains who take turns “navigating their way through obstacle courses, show jumping and even a pony tug-of-war.”

Honestly, we’d call this lady more normal than the “Ponies” club: Here’s A Woman Who Went From Buddhist Nun To Fetish Club-Goer

“Our outfits that we make are based off of bio horse equipment or made from horse equipment that’s been rearranged to fit humans,” Joey Warhorse said. “It can get pretty costly, so people are very proud of the outfits they put together.”

Riiiiight. If you need an ego boost, check out the “Ponies on the Delta” club in action.

“I enjoy kicking the cart and giving my rider a really hard time, so they have to try and get us to obey.”

Yeah, if that’s normal, then I’ve got a ten-inch hog.