BREAKING: Gwyneth Paltrow Carried Her Own Luggage

After having a conscious uncoupling from reality since birth, Gwyneth Paltrow must have finally choked on self-awareness after Angelina Jolie took a huge shade shit all up in Paltrow's gluten-free cord blood quiche, because here she is at JFK pulling her own luggage like a regular human person. I can only imagine the pain and suffering this caused her. Not in a concerned type of way.