Miranda Kerr Is Dating A 46-Year Old Billionaire

Is Orlando Bloom a very handsome man? Yes. Was Miranda Kerr convinced that, combined with her genes, Orlando Bloom would a produce an aesthetically pleasing child? Yes. Is Orlando Bloom a nice guy who genuinely seems to love his family? Yes. Does Orlando Bloom have all that Legolas money? Yes.  But please keep in mind, Orlando Bloom is not a billionaire. And nothing makes a chick tsunami off her seat like the letter "B" in front of "illionaire". So naturally, Miranda Kerr has been secretly dating 46-year old Australian billionaire James Packer for months. And if you're wondering what you have to look like to pull Victoria's Secret ass if you have a billion dollars. THIS. You have to look like this. Vogue Australia reports:

After announcing her split from Orlando Bloom just a few months ago, Miranda Kerr (and April Vogue cover model) is said to be in a relationship with James Packer. Packer, in turn, had earlier announced his own divorce from Vogue's November cover model Erica Packer; interestingly, Erica Packer and Kerr also both hail from the same town of Gunnedah (look at that six degrees of separation right there). Neither Kerr nor Packer have denied the reports after being approached a week ago. It is said that the pair have been in a secret relationship for the past few months. Kerr and Packer have known each other for several years, often holidaying together with their respective families and Packer has been said to have provided business advice to Kerr on her beauty brand, Kora.

So to recap, Miranda Kerr was happily married to Orlando Bloom until her billionaire friend divorced his wife, then she was no longer hapilly married to Orlando Bloom. This has to be some sort of coincidence, and not a long-term and calculated plan by Miranda Kerr to dive in a swimming pool of money. Nope. This is definitely true love. Of money. True love of money.