Katy Perry Is Not Engaged To John Mayer

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Ladies, chill. Just because some dude gives you a ring, that doesn’t mean he wants to marry. He might just want you to become invisible and slow go insane. Huffington Post reports:

John Mayer put a ring on Katy Perry’s finger – just not the kind you might expect. After the couple was photographed leaving Vincenti, an Italian restaurant in Los Angeles, on Valentine’s Day, Perry was spotted wearing a ruby on her ring finger, leaving many to ask if Mayer, 35, had popped the question.

I hope there really weren’t actual people who believed John Mayer proposed to Katy Perry. They don’t exist, right? Because the only question John Mayer would pop is, “Can I cum in your eye? No? What about your friend’s eye?”.