Lindsay Always Borrows Money From Ashton Kutcher That She’ll “Pay Back In A Few Weeks”

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Since Lindsay Lohan has quite figured out how to suck money directly out a penis yet, she’s now hitting up her exes for money that she totally plans to pay back as soon as they track her down and harvest her organs to sell them on the black market to recoup their money. National Enquirer reports:

DESPERATE and destitute LINDSAY LOHAN is mooching money off of “Two and a Half Men” star Ashton Kutcher – and he feels so sorry for the troubled startlet that he’s having a tough time turning her down. Sources say the two had a brief fling years ago, so Ashton feels obligated to let Lindsay treat him like her own personal cash machine! Although their brief romance was never serious, “Ashton has always had a soft spot in his heart for her, and Lindsay totally exploits it,” said a source. “She has been asking to borrow hundreds of dollars at a time with the promise to pay him back ‘in a couple of weeks.’ Ashton knows he’s never going to see the money again, but he’s very loyal,” continued the source. “Even to a train wreck like Lindsay.”

I wonder how Mila Kunis feels about this? It must be pretty convenient when Lindsay shows up at his house at 3am with a cordless drill she just found. Lindsay even lets them keep it for $20 until she gets paid! What a steal!

[h/t The Superficial]