Jennifer Lawrence Is Having Trouble Walking Because She Got Fassenbendered

Imagine Dragons - KROQ Weenie Roast, May 18 2013 (Johnny Firecloud)

Watching Michael Fassenbender in Shame was the first time I ever considered buying penis enlargement pills, so If Jennifer Lawrence accepts her Oscar with a limp, you’ll know this story is legit. Huffington Post Celebrity reports:

“Michael and Jennifer were locked in conversation for a long time, he was charming the pants off her,” an eyewitness at the party told Radar. “And even when she was talking to other people at the after party, Jennifer couldn’t keep her eyes off Michael.” The 35-year-old star of “Shame” and the 22-year-old “Silver Linings Playbook” Oscar contender first met while filming “X-Men: First Class,” which is coincidently where Lawrence met her ex-boyfriend Nicholas Hoult, whom she dated for two years. But now that Jen is single and clearly ready to mingle, she’s lucky to be filming the X-Men sequel, “X-Men: Days of Future Past,” with Fassbender.

I don’t know the plot of X-Men: Days of Future Past, but I hear they’re doing rewrites so Mystique can travel to the future so she can get vaginal reconstruction surgery.