Selena Gomez Dumped Justin Bieber

Reportedly after months of fighting and Selena Gomez finally realizing she’s dating a Canadian lesbian, Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez have split. Page Six reports:

“Justin and Selena had been fighting and on the verge of a breakup for about six months. She was constantly calling and checking on him when they were apart. It was causing a lot of tension between them.”

It’s easy to see why Selena would dump Justin. She’s a 20-year old Mexican chick. She should have like, what? Six kids by now? In Mexico they shoot you if you’re 14 and don’t have a kid walking around a laundromat yet. True story.