Kris Humphries Already Lost His Wedding Ring

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“Who gives a shit?” – everyone in the entire world. Radar Online reports:

Kim Kardashian’s new husband, Kris Humphries, has already lost his wedding ring — less than two months after tying the knot! Humphries gold and black diamond wedding band went missing at a Minneapolis airport leaving the basketball player in a state of panic, according to one eyewitness. Good Samaritan Omar Ahmad was going through the metal detector when Humphries lost the Lorraine Schwartz sparkler. “Kris must have had to take off all his jewelry or it slipped off his finger because he was freaking out and frantically looking for it yelling ‘where’s my ring?!'” Ahmad said, in an interview. “He was crawling on his knees looking for it underneath the x-ray machine. No one was helping him and very few actually recognized him except for me. So I stepped in to help.”…After 10 minutes on their knees, Ahmad said he found the band in the corner and security grabbed it. “Kris was just so thankful I helped him and and didn’t just leave him. It’s funny, I was really the only one who knew who he was.”

I assume Kris Jenner already cashed E!’s check, so I’m not understanding why Humphries was in such a panic to find this thing. There were no cameras or production staff around, so it’s not like it actually happened. You might as well tell me you saw a unicorn playing basketball. The Kardashians won’t get diagnosed with cancer or die in a plane crash unless the lighting is correct and the scene has been properly blocked first.