Rihanna Is Esquire’s “Sexiest Woman Alive”

Whenever I see a video of Rihanna, I fully expect her to be reading Tarot cards or sacrificing a chicken to let me know if I’m gonna get that big promotion or not. “CARLL ME NOW FUR YA FREEE REEDIN’!”, this video should say. I guess what I’m trying to say is that fucking her generally isn’t the first thing that comes to mind.