Ashley Greene At The 2011 Teen Choice Awards

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I just noticed that Jess seems to be a little preoccupied with me on the weekends, and who are we kidding? That’s completely understandable. But in my defense, Jess does look like Rebecca Black’s older sister. If Rebecca Black’s older sister looked like Ray Lewis in a pencil skirt from the waist down. I say that with love. But we’re not here to talk about Jess’ calves she stole from Barry Bonds, we’re here to talk about Ashley Greene and her hot ass at the 2011 Teen Choice Awards last night. Well, I wouldn’t say “talk”, really. Because there’s only two words that I think of when I think about being with Ashley Greene. And those words are pre-natal vitamins.