Britney + Lindsay + 50 pounds = Christina Aguilera

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When Christina Aguilera announced her engagement and pregnancy, we all praised her for wanting a normal life and not succumbing to the pressures of fame by her ability to balance her career and family life. Then she got divorced. And did this and this within a week. It looks like signing divorce papers were an ignition key to start the crazy. She’s Mexican, so crazy is a little redundant. Or the name of her car club. To be honest, I’m not really sure. E! Online reports:

Choosing what you want to believe, we must say Xtina has been looking a little worse for ware since her divorce. Uh, does this remind you of any other pop tart?…Now, Christina seems to just be entering this Stage 1 and having some tipsy nights. But by the stories getting passed around Hollywood, many industry folks are whispering she’s going down “the Britney Spears path.” Yes, that is a term used regularly around in this town. It’s adjacent to “the Lindsay Lohan route,” too. Reading through the comments yesterday, almost half of you defended Xtina saying we’ve all been there. Sure, most people have on occasion. Unfortunately, this boozy behavior is supposedly becoming a pattern. So does she get a free pass if she’s going through a divorce? Some of us have been there, too, and it’s damn difficult.

I don’t know if I need to light a Mother of Guadalupe candle or what, but if Christina can go ahead and go over to the Hot Mess of The Force, I’d appreciate it. No seriously, hurry it up. She’s about 20 pounds away from Splash having exclusive pics of her getting tagged and released into a Curves.