Ryan Reynolds Filed For Divorce

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If you’ve been up at night wondering if Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johansson would reconcile their differences and save the world from seeing two rich, privileged white people let their love die, sorry. TMZ reports:

Ryan Reynolds just officially filed for divorce from Scarlett Johansson, but all signs point to a more-than-amicable parting of ways … and TMZ has Ryan’s petition and Scarlett’s reply. Scarlett’s response to Ryan’s petition was filed at the same time — a strong indication the two of them coordinated the court filings. Neither party is asking for spousal support. Sources tell TMZ there is no prenup, and Ryan made more money than Scarlett during their 2-year marriage. Ryan lists the date of separation as December 14, 2010. Scarlett agrees on the date. Since everything they earned is community property, presumably it will be divided 50/50, though the petitions say property rights are yet to be determined. Although the divorce is friendly, they aren’t taking any chances. Ryan has hired disso-queen Laura Wasser, and Scarlett has retained Lynn Soodik.

Well, at least they tried. And by “tried” I mean Ryan Reynolds had exclusive motorboating rights to Scarlett’s insane rack for two years, now he gets to take half her shit. Is there some kind of class I take on how to do this? I mean, just give me test. I think I’m pretty good at both of those things.