Katy Perry Got Married

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Proving that religion and marriage are outdated concepts, a sex addict and a record label puppet who turned her back on Jesus for fame got married in India this weekend. Radar Online reports:

In the presence of friends and family, Katy Perry and Russell Brand exchanged vows Saturday in a traditional Hindu ceremony at the Aman-i-Khas resort in India. A rep for the couple released the following statement: “Russell Brand and Katy Perry are overjoyed to confirm that they were pronounced Mr. and Mrs. Brand on Saturday, October 23. The very private and spiritual ceremony, attended by the couples’ closest family and friends was performed by a Christian minister and longtime friend of the Hudson Family. The backdrop was the inspirational and majestic countryside of Northern India.”…two elephants named Laxmi and Mala arrived at the resort and as the animals walked into the venue, a red carpet was rolled out for them. In a traditional Indian wedding procession, known as the “Bharat,” the bridegroom walks to the spot where the bride awaits. The bridegroom is often on a white horse, but an elephant is considered an even grander, more magnificent mode of transportation.

A traditional Hindu ceremony? A Christian minister? Elephants? Was there a clown car and a guy getting shot out of a cannon at some point, because this sounds like something I could buy tickets for at the grocery store.