Lindsay Can Earn $50K. On A Fetish Site.

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Just in case you thought the world couldn’t possibly get anymore fucked up, a website has offered Lindsay Lohan $50,000 to…wait for it…pop balloons on camera. TMZ reports:

A rep for tells TMZ they sent the offer to Lindsay’s lawyer — if LiLo comes in and pops a few balloons — on camera of course — she’ll leave $50,000 richer. No nudity. No whips. No chains. Confused? TMZ spoke to several balloon-popping enthusiasts who tell us the rush comes from “the feeling of fear associated with a balloon that may pop at any second.” Who knew?

I hope somebody in Colombia has a Fed Ex account, because it pays to save time and ship smarter whenever Lindsay gets anywhere near cash. But whatever. I paid off my truck with my work on Clips4Sale sounds like a barbershop in the mall.