Salma Hayek Does Letterman

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Will Salma Hayek ever be not hot? Was she engineered with some Mexican biotechnology and an El Camino full of oranges that we don’t know about? Christ, this woman is beautiful. I’m not one to comment on a woman’s physical appearance in a lewd manner, but she should know that I like my milk from the tap. I just bought a box of graham crackers if she’s interested.