Screw You, Buddy

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Danny Cipriani is something called a “fly-half” for the London Wasps. I don’t know if he teleported with a fly or plays some kind of sport, but he has consecutively pounded Kelly Brook and Jessica Lowndes. I pounded a Monster energy drink this morning! Look at me go! Mirror reports:

He’s only just met her but Danny Cipriani can’t keep away from 90210 star Jessica Lowndes. They met at Richard Branson’s party on Thursday, and hooked up yet again on Friday. Sadly for them, we gatecrashed their second “platonic” date at London’s Punk nightclub. In the VIP area, the pair giggled, flirted, and shared drinks. Although they had separate tables, Jess made repeated trips to where the rugby fly-half was sat. Soon after midnight, Danny – who recently split with Kelly Brook – kissed Jess chastely goodbye and left through a side exit. A few minutes later, she left too staring hard at her mobile. Waiting for a call by any chance?

If Jessica is doing this to make me jealous, it’s not working. If she keeps this up, I won’t even use fabric softener when I wash and fold her clothes. And I won’t spray cologne on the dozen roses I send everyday. How do you like that, Jessica? Huh?! The tables have turned!

Jessica Lowndes at Wimbledon: