Ooh La La

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A donkey in a sombrero and rollerskates would make more sense being on the red carpet at a movie awards show than Lindsay Lohan, but if this cracked out bitch loves anything, it’s attention. She hasn’t made a relevant movie in six years, but she took the condom out of her hair long enough to attend the MTV Movie Awards last night. Christ, this chick is a mess. If I was an alien from another planet who just landed here and somebody showed me a picture of this skank and told me she was only 23, I’d call off the invasion, because people obviously die on Earth at 26. You are a frail people and my planet needs perkier tits than this to survive.