Joe Jonas Is All Man

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The Jonas Brothers are prancing gaywads in skinny jeans and Captain’s hats who wear purity rings and have flat-ironed Jew fros. I realize that sounds bad, but not as bad as what happens when one of their girlfriends tries to show them her vagina.

After just a few months of dating, Joe Jonas and Demi Lovato have called it quits, a source confirms to Adding insult to injury: Jonas dumped Lovato over the phone. “He didn’t have the heart to do it in person,” the source explains. And it’s not the first time Jonas has ended things that way: back in November 2008, his ex Taylor Swift admitted he dumped her during a “27 second” phone call a month before. Lovato, 17, met Jonas, 20, in 2007 on the set of Disney channel series Camp Rock. The pair finally acknowledged their romance in a March radio interview with Access Hollywood’s Billy Bush. Just last week, Lovato gushed to Us that Jonas was “my first serious relationship…He knows me better than I know myself, and I know him better than he knows himself.”

Apparently his dad made the call and not Joe himself, so I’m not really sure how many more levels of pussy this makes him. I really don’t know why they broke up, and I don’t really care, but just look at that banner picture. I don’t want to jump to conclusions, but he looks like if he had tits near his mouth he would run away like a five-year old girl being chased by a bee.

Sonny With A Chance of legal anal in about a year: