Hold Still, Ma’am

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White people never get chased by the police and seldom have to put things in their parent’s name to avoid credit checks, so their everyday lives lack excitement so they do things like cut themselves, bungee jump, and hunt bears with a knife to feel alive. Then when they die, their families say it was a tragic loss. Not really. They also like to climb mountains and sometimes make a documentaries about their experiences if they don’t die. I only mention that because Jessica Biel attended the premiere of Summit on the Summit: Kilimanjaro in New York last night where she looked like she was ready to give out blowjobs. So, in closing, I dedicated a whole post to one picture of Jessica Biel where she kinda looks like she might be giving a blowjob. Yeah, I need to get laid.