Britney Had An Abortion In 2008

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And I say that like it’s a bad thing. National Enquirer reports:

Britney and ex-husband Kevin Federline briefly reunited during the holidays two years ago — and Britney got pregnant, say sources. But when Britney told Kevin about the baby, he denied being the father and accused her of sleeping around — and a despondent Britney had an abortion…“Britney fights depression every Christmas season, but this Christmas has been one of the worst for her,” maintained another source…“I killed my baby!” she cried during a recent emotional meltdown, an insider told The ENQUIRER.

IDLYITW doesn’t miss any opportunity to call Britney Spears fat, but sometimes are hard-hitting Mark Ebner-like investigative reporting pays off. Like here and here. Was she pregnant? Um, who cares? To reiterate, it’s parents were gonna be Britney Spears and Kevin Federline. It’s not like the baby was gonna grow up to find the cure for AIDS or invent a time machine. At best, he would win $50 on a scratch off ticket he stole from the gas station he robbed for meth and beer money.

For the lulz:

Britney at JFK on December 21st. I mean, seriously, who wouldn’t want to get this pregnant?