He Remembers Now

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Hey, remember yesterday when Chris Brown said he didn’t remember beating the hell out of Rihanna? He apparently doesn’t remember that either because now he wants to “set things straight”. With “things” being the shit we saw on live television. Us Magazine reports:

He says: “There have been reports on the Internet that I didn’t remember what happened that night with Rihanna. I want to try and set things straight. “That 30 seconds of the interview they used of me was taken from a one hour interview during which that same question was asked something like four or five times — and when you look at the entire interview you will see it is not representative of what I said. “The first four times – or how ever many times it was – I gave the same answer — which was that I didn’t think it was appropriate for me to talk about what happened that night. I said it was not right for me and it really wasn’t fair to Rihanna. The fifth time – or whatever it was – I just misspoke. I was asked, ‘Do you remember doing it?’ and I said, ‘No.’ “Of course I remember what happened. Several times during the interview, my mother said that I came to her right afterwards and told her everything. But it was and still is a blur. And yes, I still can’t believe it happened because it is not me or who I am or is what happened like anything I have ever done before.”

You know what also wasn’t fair to Rihanna? Oh I don’t know, choking her out? So unless you were possessed or the alien invasion has already begun and they’ve taken your body as a host, it was you, you jackass. You did it, you said it. Just because a person can’t “remember” something doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. Unless you’re that college chick I met last night, then I don’t know what you’re talking about. Maybe your panties just had some place to be. Why don’t you go interrogate them since you’re a detective all of a sudden.