Britney Is Already Cheating

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So, you know how Britney Spears is supposed to be dating and engaged to her agent? Yeah, somebody should probably tell her that. Page Six reports:

BRITNEY Spears (above) is supposedly dating her agent, Jason Trawick — so what is she doing spending so much alone time with record producer Dallas Austin? A source tells us Spears and Austin spent some time together “two weeks ago at Dallas’ house” in Atlanta, where, “It was just the two of them for a few nights.” Another source told us that while they were there, the power duo “discussed music, life, and work.” A rep for Austin denies the two are dating: “They are good friends and have been for a long time.”

Since Britney Spears is known for her strong will power and ability to use reason and discernment in any situation she finds herself in, this story is really hard to believe. Not that I really care right now because the fire alarms have been going off in my building for the past 45 minutes now. Thanks for testing for so damn long Mr. Fire Marshall. I don’t know if you picked up on this or not, but the alarms work. Next time maybe you can tape firecrackers to my ears or launch a space shuttle over my bed.