Jennifer Love Hewitt is in Maxim

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I realize Jennifer Love Hewitt is a bottomless pit of need and insecurity with a big ass who can’t be without a boyfriend for five minutes, but I’ve wanted to hit it for like 15 years now. Long story short, I’d hit it. And her shoot in next month’s issue of Maxim really doesn’t do anything to change that. I just hope it doesn’t get all weird. I mean, she does have a brother named “Todd”. And I could see how that might cause an awkward pause when I’m pinning her knees to her ears and asking about the ownership of her vagina.