A Fancy Spicy Brown Baby

[Gallery not found]

Madonna has officially left Malawi empty-handed after a judge denied her adoption of three-year old “orphan”, Mercy James. Hey, but not before she had a complete meltdown then planned a fundraiser to bribe her way into a successful appeal. Good times! The Sun says:

The shattered singer — who had been told by government officials that three-year-old Mercy James was “definitely hers” — shrieked in horror after her lawyer broke the devastating news. Then Madge, who had spent nearly two years preparing to adopt the tot as a sister to Malawian son David Banda, sat motionless before “furiously storming off” to her room at the luxury lodge where she had been staying in the African country. One worker there said: “She was unrecognisably angry — she seemed in emotional agony. “We couldn’t tell if she was crying, but her daughter Lourdes ran and put her arms round her. Madonna said to her lawyer, ‘This is the worst day of my life’. “She yelled at him, ‘What went wrong? How could this happen? He was staring at the ground.”

Two days after her adoption request was denied, Madonna announced a fundraiser whose guest list will include Malawian government officials and possibly the judge who ruled in her case. Gee, I wonder why? TMZ reports:

Government officials and staff members of Raising Malawi charity are on the guest list for the event, along with traditional dancers. No word if the judge who denied Madge will attend. Madonna’s lawyer said she will appeal Friday’s judgment that she could not adopt a 3-year-old girl because she had not been a resident in Malawi. This massive party looks like the start of her appeal, at least socially.

Look, I kinda admire Madonna for trying to ease the guilt of living like a self-involved, debauched whore for most of her life by adopting some African kid, but to reiterate, it’s Madonna. I hate her. I could accidentally run over her with my truck but I’d jump out and give all the bystanders high-fives to make them think I did it on purpose.