The 2008 American Music Awards Were Last Night

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All you need to know about the AMAs is that Daughtry, Flo Rida, Alvin and the Chipmunks, and Kid Rock were nominated for awards. Music awards. Seriously? This is what we’ve come to? I’ve saw more talent that one time I saw a monkey ride a skateboard.

I have no clue what has happened to Christina Aguilera these last couple of months. She looks like a male Christina Aguilera impersonator. The only way these pictures could be more disappointing is if she had a horse tail.

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Rihanna stole somebody’s hair and some baby’s blanket to walk the red carpet, and strangely, it’s still not enough to convince me that this chick is hot. The only way I would is if she was standing in molten lava. And even then, she’d really have to sell it.

I guess Miley Cyrus showed up alone because she’s been taking some heat for having a 20 year old boyfriend. Turns out that’s illegal. Other things that should be illegal: My lemon cookies. It’s like awesomeness in your mouth!

Hey, look. It’s T-Pain. A rapper with a letter in his name, ridiculous jewelry, and a stupid hat. Wow! How original! In 50 years, historians will totally be able to differentiate him from the hundred other fucking rappers with hyphens in their name.

We haven’t seen Jordin Sparks in a while and it sorta makes me wonder where she’s been. My guess? Hibernating or marrying Shrek. It’s hard to tell.