Lindsay Lohan Must Be Stopped

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If you’re an orphan in another country, and you happen to have Internet access, and you’re reading this. Run! Run away! The Daily Mail reports:

Lindsay Lohan may only be 22, but she’s already started making plans to adopt a child. The reformer Hollywood hellraiser insists she is happier than ever since finding love with DJ Samantha Ronson and is looking forward to the future. After experiencing a difficult childhood and past few years, Lohan believes her life experience would make her a good mother. She tells the latest edition of Marie Claire magazine: ‘At some point, I want to adopt a kid as well. ‘A child in need or a newborn from another country. I’m not sure yet.'”

If I was an orphan I’d rather die from malaria or get mauled by a lion. At least when the lion kills me it will be because he meant to, not because it was doing lines off the dash.

Lindsay and her white legs yesterday after a week at the beach: