Lindsay Lohan is 22 and Really Gay
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Two years ago, Lindsay Lohan could charge $100,000 for any club to host her birthday party. Now, since she drank and fucked her career away, she turned 22 last night with an “intimate prom-themed” party at Teddy’s in Hollywood. Her date, or course, was the dyketastic Samantha Ronson. People says:
The actress – wearing a bright pink strapless micro-minidress by Bradley Bayou and an elaborate diamond necklace – arrived at Teddy’s lounge inside the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel just after 10 p.m. And her companion Ronson took the prom-theme seriously, dressed to the nines in black pants, a tuxedo shirt, bow tie and top hat with red trim. Once the 50 guests – including former Sopranos star Jamie Lynn Sigler – began arriving at the balloon-filled venue, the Birthday Girl greeted them all energetically with smiles, hugs and kisses. Ronson was never far behind, often keeping her hand on the small of Lohan’s back.…As the party wound down, the couple appeared to relax, even sneaking in a small peck on the lips at the DJ booth. By 1:15 a.m., the music was muted and Lohan turned out the lights with Ronson by her side.”
I’ve thought about it for like ten minutes now, but I can’t seem to think of anybody who is more horrifically uglier than Samantha Ronson. Seriously, I tried. I tried Kristen Dunst, but even then you have to give her fur or boar tusks. I think my scientific data is trying to say is that Samantha Ronson is gross. She looks like something in a video game you have to kill in order to move to the next level.