Jennifer Lopez is Demanding

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I know this may come as complete shock, but Jennifer Lopez is a massive bitch. Page Six reports:

Jennifer Lopez was a diva with a capital D shopping last week at the Catherine Malandrino boutique on Manhasset’s Miracle Mile, near where she lives with hubby Marc Anthony. “She demanded the store be shut down for her to shop alone, but they said, ‘Absolutely not,’ ” said our spy. “Then one of her eight-person entourage, including two bodyguards with their guns showing, was yelling at the clerk that Jennifer gets a 50 percent discount. Jennifer also tried on about a million outfits, then just threw it all in a pile in the dressing room and didn’t buy one thing.” J.Lo’s rep did not return a call.”

Seriously, is there anyone who still gives a shit about Jennifer Lopez? The last time she was even close to being considered relevant, I could fill up my truck without having to sell my organs, but for some reason, she still thinks it’s 2001. The next time Lopez walks in a store the cashier should be legally allowed to stuff her in a barrel and float it out to sea.