Britney Spears Lost 61 Million Dollars

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Since becoming Britney Spears’ co-conservator in February Britney’s father, Jamie Spears, has done a commendable job of keeping Britney chained up long enough to stop her from running over her kids or getting gangbanged by paparazzi, but it may have been too late to save Britney’s money. How late? Hold on to your fucking hat. In Touch Weekly reports:

Jamie must have learned just how much of a toll Britney’s crazy behavior, which started in February 2007 when she shaved her head, has had on her bank account – she’s lost nearly $61 million. “It’s staggering how much money has been used up,” a family friend says. In addition to the enormous tab for legal bills, rehab and psychiatric care, Britney’s inability to work has cost her a fortune. “By not touring for her last album [Blackout], she lost out on $50 million,” estimates Robert Bianchi, an LA-based CPA who isn’t an accountant for Britney. Jamie hired his own accountants to sort out the money mess and bring an end to the 26-year-old’s excessive spending. “It’s been quite a challenge getting things under control,” the insider says.”

Jesus, $61 million in a year? Aren’t we supposed to be in a recession? Holy shit. I could move to Thailand right now and get a daily delivery of a van full of virgins and fresh dolphin steaks sauteed in cord blood for the next 20 years and at worst I’d come back to America with $59 million. Britney Spears has worn the same boots every day for the past two years. The only way she could have wasted this money faster is if she used it to put out a fire.

Britney working out at Bally Total Fitness yesterday: