Britney Spears Had a Wonderful Day

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Britney Spears’ child custody battle continued today where it was widely speculated that she would lose her kids because of testimony of a secret witness. Tony Barretto, a former bodyguard of Britney Spears, filed a declaration alleging “nudity, drug use, and safety issues post rehab.” TMZ reports:

Gloria Allred, Barretto’s attorney, said in a press conference today that Brit’s former hired muscle was prepared to testify under oath today, but that neither the court nor Britney’s attorneys chose to cross-examine him. She said his declaration went “unrefuted and unchallenged.” Barretto started working for Britney when she got out of rehab, and was fired on May 17 because, said Allred, “He did not hear her when he was asked to pick up her hat.”

Earlier today it was learned that Britney Spears lawyer, Laura Wasser, filed documents to legally withdraw as Britney’s attorney. Her reason? Britney Spears is an idiot.

The word we hear is that Britney was a problem client because she just didn’t listen to and follow the advice Wasser gave so Spears could maintain custody and end the war. In spite of Spears’ erratic behavior and stint in rehab, Wasser was able to hammer out a 50/50 custody split with K-Fed — a small miracle.”

It really doesn’t matter what happens at this point, because the only two choices Sean Preston and Jayden James have are Kevin Federline and Britney Spears. Nice. They’d probably have a better chance reaching the 1st grade if they got shipwrecked or adopted by a family in Darfur.

Britney a couple days before her VMAs disaster: