The Hogans are Great

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Hulk Hogan (real name: Terry Bollea) has retained high-powered Clearwater, FL attorney J. Kevin Hayslett, a criminal defense lawyer who specializes in DUI cases, to defend his son, Nick Hogan (real name: Nick Bollea), who is due in court on September 10 for plowing his yellow Toyota Supra into a median and a tree (while illegally street racing a Dodge Viper) in downtown Clearwater Sunday night. His passenger, Iraq war veteran John Graziano, remains in critical condition.

Everything that happened … was because of excessive speed,” Clearwater police spokesman Wayne Shelor has said. Bollea was treated and released from Bayfront Medical Center, but a passenger in the Supra, John Graziano, 22, remained at the hospital in critical condition late Tuesday, a hospital spokeswoman said. Graziano, a Marine, returned from Iraq last year, family members have said. Bollea has not been charged in Monday’s wreck. Investigators continue to piece together what happened, Shelor said.”

Since getting his license in July 2005, Nick Hogan has been cited for speeding four times. 115 in a 70, 57 in a 30, 106 in a 70, and 82 in a 45 (a construction zone where workers were present). It may be just me, but I can think of a few things this jackass needs besides a lawyer. Like a bear trap where his airbag should be. Because if the Iraqis don’t kill you, take a ride with Nick Hogan. That should do the trick.

View Nick’s traffic tickets here.

I can only assume they hired this lawyer because Graziano is about to die. How compassionate.

She-Hulk on the beach: