Have the Damn Baby Already
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Salma Hayek has been pregnant for like two years now, and at this point I don’t even want to guess what she’s having. It could turn out to be a human baby or it could turn out to be an elephant. There’s no telling. The only thing I do know is that Salma Hayek used to be one one hottest pieces of ass working in Hollywood, now she looks like she works at Monsters Inc. So if you ever see her walking down the street it’s ok to point and scream. Monstropolis actually depends on it.