Paris Hilton is Out of Jail

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In news that will make you rethink your stance on hate crimes, Paris Hilton has been released from jail. Yes, your math is right. She was released after only three days of her already shortened sentence. TMZ reports:

Unimpeachable sources tell TMZ the deal was sealed yesterday, and that Hilton made her exit early early this morning. She was originally sentenced to 45 days in jail, but that was reduced to 23. She served a total of three days. The L.A. County Sheriff’s Department will hold a news conference in an hour to discuss what went down.”

Well, I guess there’s that then. Paris’ big debt to society was paid by going to timeout for three days. I’m sured she learned her lesson. Her lesson that taught her that when you break the law repeatedly that there might be a slight chance that you could be inconvenienced. Law enforcement personnel couldn’t be reached because they were busy jumping in the piles of money.

Update: Paris has has been put under house arrest. Authorities say she was released due to “medical reasons.”

A more depressing update: Watch the L.A. County Sheriff’s Department press conference here. “Reporters hammered away about Paris’ medical condition during a press conference in front of the jail, where she was released early this morning, but Whitmore said that due to confidentiality laws, he could not discuss even the slightest health-related details.” Yeah, that sounds about right.