Candid pic of assembly line workers at the Duggar Indoctrination Factory. circa 2015
When you’re fueled by fear and punishment to believe in a morally ambivalent magical sky wizard who you think will solve all your problems if you just get on your knees a lot and write enough checks, sometimes you get trampled to death, and sometimes you’re taught that letting Josh Duggar use your uterus to create drones for the Christian Army before you hit 28 is better than evil, worldly desires such as self-worth, a college degree, and being comfortable in a dress. But sometimes you just have to move back in with your parents like Anna Duggar, because as my previous run on sentence suggests, where else is she gonna go? A Buddhist temple? They don’t really like her kind either.
But now, In Touch claims the stay-at-home mom, 27, and her four young children have fled their native Arkansas and the Duggar family for her parents’ home in Florida. RadarOnline.com can reveal that Anna’s mother and father, Mike and Suzette Keller, own a woodsy retreat in north central Florida— a perfect spot to protect the humiliated Anna from prying eyes. But unfortunately, as sources have exclusively told Radar, the Keller parents are unlikely give their daughter the strength to divorce her accused child molester and adulterer husband of seven years…“She’s looking forward to seeing him in a month or two when the first spousal visitation is allowed,” an insider tells the magazine. “She just prays that he gets the help he needs so they can go on with their life together, despite everything he did to her.”
I’d like to think if Jesus were alive that Anna could text him and he’d be like, “do what? oh hell no otw” then come over and help her pack, because that’s what friends do after you’ve been lied to about your future husband fingering his sisters while they slept and when you find out why he won’t let you see the credit card statement. Normally, I’d wish Anna could be rewarded at some point for the dedication she’s shown this asshole, but people who run Josh’s ‘rehab” like to bang underage girls and stage mass shootings to scare the shit out of little kids, so my hopes aren’t really high. My anticipation for Amazon’s The Man In The High Castle is still pretty high though. Not sure what that has to do with this, but whatever. I can end this however I want.
I don’t want to seem impartial, so here’s a little something for Josh when he hits a free wi-fi spot. I know he’s on a budget
Jadeon Stage Bikini
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Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
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Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
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Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
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Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
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Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
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Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
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Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
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Jadeon Stage
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Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
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Jadeon Stage
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Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
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Jadeon Stage
51858935 Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
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Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
-
Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
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Jadeon Stage
Hip Hop Dancer Jadeon Stage does a sexy photo shoot with Glamour photographer Joel Flora in Malibu, California on September 23, 2015. FameFlynet, Inc - Beverly Hills, CA, USA - +1 (818) 307-4813
