Justin Bieber Jumped Off A Cliff, Bursted His Eardrum
When you’re rich and white, you have to do things that make you feel more alive by being closer to death, because being pulled over by police or walking down the street just doesn’t cut it. So you have to do things like skydiving, getting in a shark cage, and date raping girls in a fraternity. Also cliff diving.
If anyone was going to be injured after deliberately hurling themselves off a cliff, it was going to be Justin Bieber. The singer was left potentially needing surgery for a ruptured eardrum after he attempted to leap into the sea from a particularly high piece of land. “Busted my ear drum cliff diving,” he told his followers on Twitter. “Doc says might need surgery now. Sucks.”
Now for the bad news.
“My ear drum might back us up a little but I’m still bringing you this new music,” he commiserated.
Can I burst my eardrum instead? That would be pretty helpful.